How well do you accept YOU? Does your worth depend on others acceptance of you? Or do you appraise yourself beyond limit?
The Worth or Worship of Self are vital terminologies that is employed whether consciously or unconsciously by every individual in our day-to-day life. Nonetheless, because of the very close borders; both are being misunderstood or misinterpreted in our relationships generally. What value do you place on yourself and how do you express it?
Evelyn is a receptionist at BODKINGS Coutures, where real fashion is given outstanding definition, and she performs her function optimally, but her interest in fabrics and designs made her develop her skill in the art.
One Friday, a beautiful one it appears because of the seemingly TGIF euphoria; Mrs Tiego, Evelyn’s boss was in her office preparing for the day’s activities when she got a calm yet troubling call, she was to leave for Agbor, Delta state immediately. The new development disrupted her plans for the day; Mrs Tiego got to her work place that morning with the intention of finishing all pending clothes that were due for collection the following day, howbeit she couldn’t any longer. So, she left instructions for Ozichi and Wuraola, who happened to be the competent hands around.
Later that day, Ozichi became indisposed, therefore Wuraola became saddled with much responsibility; with the aid of some apprentice she was able to finish some customer’s work.
Mrs Ibiyemi was however not as lucky as the other customers, as the clothes she planned wearing to her niece’s wedding the next day wasn’t ready. Oblivious of the obtainable, she smiled into BODKINGS Couture with lovely strides and poise, Mrs Ibiyemi tapped Evelyn’s desk to announce her arrival in her usual habit. With a warm smile, Evelyn greeted her politely while she proceeded to check her clothes status on the system’s database, and she discovered that it isn’t ready; apologetically and calmly she explained to Mrs Ibiyemi, who didn’t take it lightly. So furious was Ibiyemi that she threw caution to the wind as she started raining insults and insisting she won’t leave until she gets her cloth. Evelyn, who has been pacifying her in futility sat down trying to calm her brewing anger, while she awaits the end of Ibiyemi’s show; as if pre-planned Mrs Ibiyemi stopped ranting when she discovered that she has been ignored.
Meanwhile at the workshop, while the drama was ongoing in the sales floor cum reception, Wuraola who had gotten wind of the saga intensified effort, but there was difficulty in getting the desired style because Wuraola wasn’t versed in padded patches peplum, so she called to inform Evelyn to handle the situation as the cloth can't be ready for obvious reason.
Evelyn stood up to address Mrs Ibiyemi “…madam, I am a learned, competent, and a reliable employee who discharges job function and responsibility efficiently, which explains why I occupy this position; I am not in any way an object of ridicule and I know that excluding making of dresses, my duties involves getting your cloth preferences, passing the information to the right office and welcoming customers. Nonetheless, I could have been useful to you by finishing up your work owing to my ability in tailoring but your display just made you forfeit that opportunity. So, will you be kind enough to check back next week?” Evelyn asked, concluding her statement.
Hearing this, Mrs Ibiyemi went down on her kneels begging for a reconsideration, after much pleading, a lower cadre receptionist replaced Evelyn while she went into the workshop for the cloth completion.
Will you adjudge Evelyn as an individual who does Self Worship or the one who has got Self-Worth?
Okay, imagine this scenery...
Mr Alakia is a reputable business man who is widely known for his business acumen, both home and abroad, infact, records have it that he is one of the top three richest men in the world; everyone can attest to the fact that hard work brought him to that altitude.
Alakia, though a philanthropist, however has a habit; whosoever seeks Alakia for assistance will never leave without hearing his success tale and how only his might, coupled with ability has brought him thus far; he rarely takes to cognizance the inputs of family and friends or other factors responsible for his success like: teamwork, prayers, people’s recommendation or even God. Sayings like these are never scarce in his mouth “….i am who I am today because I sleep one and half hour a day, I read all readable books, bought the right stock and shares, struggled to meet the right people, obey and follow principles that makes one; and above all am a disciplined being. You need to do all of these to at least get close to where we are.”
Now let’s weigh both scenarios, both Evelyn and Alakia talked about their abilities but there is a difference. Self-Worship could easily be mistaken for Self-worth; this is because there is a very thin line between both, we all have an expectation of values from other individuals and vice-versa, but how well do we interprete it?
Self-worth is a judgment of one’s self i.e. a sense of one’s own value as a person. It reflects a person’s overall subjective emotional and logical evaluation of his/her worth. This may otherwise be called Self-Esteem/Respect. Self-Worship on the other hand means the rendering of homage and honour that is deemed for a sacred being or object to one’s self. It therefore means an immoderate self conceit, i.e. idolizing self.
Individual’s perception of worth however varies, while some have a healthy/high Self-worth by trusting in their capacity and abilities in a dignified believe of self; some others operate on a low or wrong self –worth characterized by a low judgment or perception of self (inferiority complex).
Every individual is worthy, and therefore should have sense of Value by understanding how valuable one is and allowing your abilities say that on your behalf, i.e. stating the obvious about you without necessarily talking or appraising self; the moment there is a shift to the adoration of self efforts, then it has already translated to Self-Worship.
Peter Coyote opine that, "the Self is just not a worthy enough vehicle to worship." Nonetheless, I would say it is valuable enough to be adjudged worthy.
Individuals with Self-worth sees his/her capabilities and knows he/she can’t be trodden; yet understands that there is more to be done and accomplished, but the Self-Worshipped individual believes he/she has it all and therefore rarely takes input or views of others to consideration.
Are you an Evelyn or Alakia? Know your worth, don't sell yourself cheap; Live your value but don’t cross the borders, the aftermath of Self-Worship can be deadly.
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